


Come Back

by greystrash



Category: Grey's Anatomy
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, still love merluca though, the best ship after merder, this is me being merthan trash
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-22
Updated: 2020-11-18
Packaged: 2021-03-08 00:28:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,301
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26606761
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/greystrash/pseuds/greystrash
Summary: Nathan Riggs was gone.Gone from Grey Sloan.Gone from Meredith's Grey's life.Until he wasn't.
Relationships: Meredith Grey/Nathan Riggs
Comments: 3
Kudos: 30





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> i miss them sm. merder is superior but merthan should've been endgame

Meredith Grey sighed. Nathan Riggs, her boyfriend of a few months, had just left and went to his fiancee. Crazy right? This situation isn't one most people would imagine themselves in. But here Meredith was, standing in a parking lot, staring blankly into space. She had seen it coming of course, she didn't believe that anyone close to her would stay in her life.

Trust issues much?

Derek, Lexie, George, hell, even her mother. Ellis Grey. These losses compelled Meredith to build up carefully crafted barriers, designed perfectly to keep people out. Everytime she lost someone, these defences grew, and the once carefree girl that started her intern year was now the polar opposite. 

But then Nathan came into the picture.

When most would be put off by her lack of interest and overall off putting attitude Nathan took that as a challenge of sorts, relentlessly chipping away at her walls until they finally broke. 

Which is why it hurt all the more when Meredith got news of Megan.

Nathan had been perfect for her. He understood the pain of loosing the person you loved most in this world. They both were plagued by the ghosts of their past, Meredith with Derek, and Nathan, Megan.

Except he wasn't

Megan was alive

She wouldn't have that comfort of having Nathan in her life anymore, someone to wake up to, someone to make her laugh in the depths of the night. She would miss that. Meredith's thoughts wondered to the possibility of Nathan picking her, over Megan. She imagined him meeting her kids, and having dinner with all five of them while laughing and being a family.

A family that was torn from her when Derek died. Even when life fried beating her down with countless traumatic experiences, she had him. Until that dreaded day. Meredith had woken up, sent him away and little did she know, Derek would leave her a widow by nightfall. Meredith had spent many nights tossing and turning, contemplating what her days would be like if the love of her life wasn't taken away so soon.

Nathan was her second chance at that love, he was special. The first person she could imagine having a future with, but he was gone. He would go back to Megan and leave, finally reunited with his great love, the thought of which left Meredith with a bitter taste in her mouth

Chiding herself for her selfish thoughts, Meredith went back to her car. She could handle this. Nathan and her hadn't even even been together for that long. She was Meredith Grey after all. A woman who had been through a absurd amount of hurt in one lifetime. She could bounce back from this.

Right?


	2. Chapter 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nathan's thoughts on Megan's return. Meredith mourns the loss of a sense of normalcy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for this short chapter :(

-

Megan was alive. Nathan's thoughts were rushing through his head at the speed of light. His fiancee, the person who he had grieved for the last ten years was back. 

As he was driving to the hospital he couldn't help but let out a giddy laugh. She was back! The thought of seeing Megan again made him only drive faster, eager to reunite with her. 

Before long, he arrived at the military hospital. Jumping out of his car, Nathan slammed the door and headed towards the entrance. The next few minutes passed in a blur, various people coming and going, asking for IDs and whatnot, before he arrived at the room.

Owen and Amelia were already there. Owen was sitting down on a chair, his back hunched with Amelia stroking his hair murmuring something in his ear when Nathan sat next to them. Owen's head perked up at the interference.

“Why is he here,” He spat bitterly, his expression morphing into one of complete and utter hate. “He’s Megan’s fiancée Owen he has a right to be here” Amelia shot back at him. “You mean the adulterous fiancée who is also the reason why Meg has been missing for almost a decade now?” 

Nathan stepped back from Owen. It was obvious he wasn't ready for Nathan's presence, even before Megan was found, the situation between them wasn't the best, but now…. It was better if he left.

“Fine, if you don’t want me here I’ll go,” Nathan glanced at Owen one last time. “No Nath…” Amelia tried to say but before she could finish Nathan was out of the room.

As quickly as he had come to the hospital, Nathan left, getting back in his car and driving out of the parking lot. Nathan drove quickly, attempting to drive to the nearest hotel, motel, anything without collapsing. 

He was so tired. Every moment that passed, Nathan felt his eyelids getting heavier. He caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror. Nathan's usually neat hair was frizzled, and his eyebags were pronounced. Yes, this day had faxed him heavily

All he wanted was to be with Megan, to comfort her, and make sure that she knew that he was there now. He wanted to know she was gonna be safe, and to be there for her, through what he can imagine would be a long and painful road to recovery, both emotionally and physically, but Owen, who seemed to hate Nathan with every fibre in his body, immediately stopped him. 

That hurt more than Nathan could put into words. There was a time in which he considered Owen a brother. Overwhelmed with painful memories, Nathan pulled off the highway, coming to a stop at the side of the road. 

He slammed the steering wheel. Nathan cursed and shouted at god knows who for what seemed like an eternity. Why was his life this messed up? Running his hands through his hair, Nathan attempted to calm himself down when he felt his phone vibrate in his pocket. It was a text from Meredith.

Nathan's heart immediately dropped. He forgot about her. Through all of this, Nathan hadn't called, made any attempt to contact her, really. The message read, “Hey, I heard from Amelia what happened, Hope everything turns out okay!” 

For the first time that day Nathan smiled, Meredith was the first woman after Megan that made him feel something. Sure, he had had his fair share of one night stands and half-hearted relationships that ended quickly, but with Meredith it was different. 

Nathan felt something for her, it wasn't a simple infatuation, in fact, he would go as far as to call it love. Meredith understood what it was like to lose the love of her life. She understood the pain of the one person who promised not to leave, leaving you. From the little Nathan had heard about Derek, he could tell he was special. 

The type of guy who would leave people swooning, ages after he'd leave the room. In fact, Nathan recalled, Meredith, telling him in one of their post-sex conversations, that her friend had coined a nickname for Derek in her intern year. 

McDreamy. 

It was fitting. Their conversations at night were what he looked forward to the most in a day, Meredith laying her head on Nathan's chest, with his fingers running through her hair, both perfectly content.

Along with this intimate position came equally intimate conversations, both sharing stories from their pasts, Some nights, comedic anecdotes, while other times, heavy traumas that left Nathan even more in awe of the woman in front of him. The phone shines, illuminating the car. He quickly taps a response. 

“Hey Mer, I just left the hospital. Owen wouldn't let me see Megan, seems to think I don't deserve to see her. Hope you're doing okay!”

Looking over the message, he tapped send before slipping his phone back into his pocket. Taking a few deep breaths, Nathan started the car, and headed to the nearest hotel, falling into a restless sleep. 

-

Meredith arrived back home after a tiring day. In the span of twenty four hours, so much had happened. The hospital had been set on fire, which made a complete mess of her life professionally, and for her personal life? Well, after what had happened in the parking lot, she wasn't quite sure about that either. If it weren't for their situation, after a day like this Meredith would come back home and wrap herself in Nathan's arms, and fall asleep to his steady heartbeat, but even that small comfort had been ripped away. It was as if life was playing some cruel joke on her.

With Megan back, Meredith knew exactly what would happen. Nathan would leave. Of course. It's a sensible thing to do. You wouldn't exactly leave the love of your life, thought dead for a decade, for a simple rebound.

That's what they were after all, two lost people who had found comfort in each other. But the moment someone, in Nathan's case THE one came along, the other would be left in the dust. Meredith shook her head, attempting to get rid of those painful thoughts before going to see her kids. 

Without Bailey, Zola and Ellis, Meredith wasn't sure if she'd be able to get over the immediate slump she was plunged into after losing Derek. When she looked at her kids, she saw him. 

Zola had his intellect, she was shaft witted and intelligence, and sometimes Meredith would brief her on the day's surgeries, in simplified terms, whenever this happened, Zola would badger her with questions, and would tel, her about how much she wanted to be like her dad, a neurosurgeon. 

Bailey had his eyes, who's depths held an endless curiosity, which Meredith haa always admired in his father. Lastly, Ellis, who's birth was akin to a lifesaver for Meredith. In that dark period of her life, when she felt as though everyday was an upward struggle, Ellis gave her someone to take care of. 

Normally a parent would complain while changing dirty diapers or soothing a crying baby in the middle of the night, but for Meredith these moments were one less that were spent drowning in her constant grief. 

She pressed tender kisses to each of her kid's forehead, walking back to the door of their bedroom before turning to look at all of them, gazing adoringly before shutting the door quietly. Meredith headed towards her own bedroom, only just managing to change into a pair of grey sweats and a t- shirt before collapsing on her bed.

-

When she woke up today, Meredith was hit by a wave of problems. It seemed as though the world hated her. Bailey had a problem with his backpack, Amelia somehow had created a mess in the bathroom, and Ellis had spilled milk on the floor. With Amelia at Owen's house nowadays and Alex with Jo on their honeymoon, Meredith's resolve was stretched thin, only having Maggie to assist with her tumultuous life. 

She barely managed to hustle her sister and the kids into the car before speeding off to the hospital. Meredith hastily made her way to the attendings lounge with Maggie taking the kids to daycare. Barely changing into her scrubs in time for rounds, Meredith collapses on the lounge's couch already tired from the tedious start to her day. Closing her eyes, Meredith started to drift off. She really had only gotten four hours of sleep last night, the stress of her life's recent events finally catching up to her.

Meredith started dozing off, if only for a few minutes. She knew she had a surgery in a few hours but a little power nap wouldn't hurt anyone, After what seemed like a minute or two of rest, Meredith was woken up by the sound of the door unlocking and the lights turning on. Slowly sitting up from her position on the couch, Meredith blinked a few times, ready to face whoever interrupted her peaceful moment.

It was Nathan. 

Wait, Nathan?

Her brain, slightly drowsy from sleep, took a few moments to process what was happening. “Wh-what are you doing here?” Meredith muttered, still adjusting to the harsh lighting. 

Nathan smiled. “And here I thought you'd be happy to see me.” He joked, sitting next to her on the couch. Meredith immediately stood up, eager to put some space in between the two of them. 

They stared at each other for a while, neither of them wanting to break the silence that had been created 

“How are Megan and Farouk?” Meredith asked, attempting to fill the awkward moment. She knew this must be a pitiful conversation starter but it was all she could really come up with right now.

“Well it's complicated, Turns out a decade can change people.” Nathan shrugged letting out a chuckle, a meager attempt at lightening the situation. Meredith's eyes softened. “I’m sorry.” she whispered. Nathan shot her a small smile of gratitude before casting his gaze to the ground. Even with Meredith, a woman he trusted deeply, Megan was a sore spot. Their relationship was at a breaking point, and Nathan knew that they were moments away from a separation.

“So, you came to Seattle?” Meredith questioned, eager to change the subject

“Yeah I did, just came for a surgery. And to resolve some unfinished business…” Nathan trailed off before turning his gaze back to Meredith. He really did feel bad about the way he had simply left, saying his goodbyes with a simple text message. At the time it had felt enough, with him and Megan still in their honeymoon phase but now he could see just how rude he was to leave like that. 

“We should get a drink and catch up sometime, it's been a while.” Meredith proposed. 

Nathan glanced at her, slightly shocked. He had half expected her to yell at him for coming back, never mind ask him out for a drink especially after how they had left things.

“Yeah, give me a time and a place and I'll be there.” Nathan confirmed. 

“Yeah, I would love that,” She said, throwing him a soft smile. Nathan returned the sentiment before turning to leave the lounge. 

-

Meredith Grey was in crisis. After all, it isn't every day your ex comes back and asks you to “catch up.” She imagined several ways this situation could go. It could very well be a perfectly normal conversation between friends for all she knew. An innocent catch up that would leave both parties completely unaffected. God she hoped that was the case. But the way Nathan had looked at her was anything but that. Meredith remembered that look quite well. And it was anything but platonic. 

As Meredith was preoccupied with her thoughts and simply contemplating her confusing life she failed to notice Andrew Deluca creep up behind her. Almost immediately after she could perceive his presence, Andrew took her by the hand and led her to the nearest on call room. 

“Andrew wha-” Meredith was cut off by Andrew's lips crashing on hers. She took very little time to react, immediately kissing back and letting her hands wander over her resident's torso. 

They had done this before of course. Starting with a seemingly innocent drunken kiss on Andrew's part turned into.. Well.. Meredith couldn't quite tell what this was. What they were. But she did know one thing. Meredith wanted Andrew and he had made it quite clear on several occasions that he reciprocated, from stolen kisses in the skills lab to make out sessions on his apartment's couch. 

So did it really matter if they put a label on it? Meredith was snapped out of her thoughts when she felt Andrew's hand tug on the waistband of her scrubs. They were getting in dangerous territory now. Meredith could feel that the hole she dug herself into was only getting deeper as Andrews mouth began moving down, leaving passionate kisses on her jawline 

“Andre-, Andrew not at work.” Meredith managed to stutter although she made no efforts to stop his caresses. “That's what you said the last time” Andrew whispered, smirking while continuing his torturous kisses on her neck.

“No, Andrew I have to get to surgery.” Meredith mumbled before Andrew finally stopped. 

“Okay, but We'll come back to this” Andrew shot her a lascivious glance before pulling her in for one more chaste kiss and exiting the on call room. 

-

Meredith stood there for a while, trying to recover her wits after that moment with Andrew but got interrupted by a code blue. It was her GSW patient, Jake Cortez. He had been admitted to the ICU a few weeks ago and had been slipping in and out of consciousness. Meredith still remembered the look on his wife's eyes when she learnt of her husband's status. Ever since Derek had died Meredith had grown a new found sympathy for people losing their spouses. She knew the feeling of hopelessness and despair that followed and she would not let this happen to Jake's wife.

Meredith sprinted to Jake's room and immediately took charge. “He's tachycardic, charge to 200! Clear!” Checking the monitor, Meredith saw no change. “Damn it, start CPR!” An intern started compressions, but to no avail. Jake was gone. Slowly, the staff redrew their efforts and started to clear the room. Meredith was frozen. How could this happen? Just today he was talking to his children, telling his son off for not doing his homework. And now? He was gone and his youngest daughter who was only five was left fatherless.

“Dr Grey?”

Slowly coming back to her senses, Meredith realized she neglected to call it.

“Time of death 5:21”

Meredith exited the room hastily, feeling significantly worse than before. This patient had reminded her of Derek. Even though the circumstances of their deaths were different, when Jake was awake, his personality had a striking resemblance to that of her late husband. She couldn't bear to face his wife now. It would be too painful.

Meredith quickly ducked into an on call room, collapsing on the mattress. She breathed in and out slowly, attempting to calm herself down. After all, an on call room was hardly the place to have a breakdown. Eventually, Meredith allowed herself to cry silent tears. Tears of grief, both for Jake and Derek, when she heard the door being opened. Meredith cursed under her breath. She forgot to lock the door. And of course it was the one person she was avoiding. 

Nathan immediately rushed to her side, wrapping his arms around Meredith's trembling frame. “Hey what's wrong?” He whispered. “Please leave me alone, I don't want to see you right now.” She mumbled, refusing to meet his eyes. “Well, at least tell me what's wrong.” Nathan insisted. 

He knew that anything that would get her in this state, crying in an on call room while she was at work was something worth sharing with him. “I'm fine!” Meredith snapped, recoiling from Nathan momentarily. “Just let it go.” Nathan nodded. They stayed in complete silence for a moment, Meredith slowly calming down while Nathan held her in his arms and stroked her hair until she finally spoke.

“There was a patient.” Meredith sniffled. “He reminded me of Derek. Same hair. That attitude that makes you want to yell and kiss him simultaneously.” Nathan chuckled at that. “And he died. He died and I couldn't save him-” Meredith broke down in tears yet hatagain, burying her head in the crook of Nathan's neck. Nathan was grateful that Meredith still allowed herself to be this intimate with him.

Suddenly he felt Meredith's phone go off in the pocket of her scrubs. Meredith broke off from his embrace wiping her tears with the back of her hand. “I should get that.” She glanced down at her pager for a moment before returning her gaze to Nathan. “Thank you for this Nathan.” Meredith gave him a taut smile before exiting the on call room.

**Author's Note:**

> no copyright intended


End file.
